Friday, August 27, 2010

Death of an Artist!!!!!

working alone and enjoying painting. I like to be left alone with my paints and canvas, playing with colours ..smelling them (though I get frequent headaches and fever due to the fumes emitted by them!) i love to paint. over a decade and still going strong . No support whatso ever ..still going strong.
Till when i do not know...many time feel lost ...where will this lead me.I am not very social person and do not like the limelight. But this world has a different take. The person in limelight is a good artist and works demand a good price. When I try my hand and selling my works I feel losing my creativity, how can I sell a part of me! every painting is a special one..so many efforts..so much involvement..such a long journey..and one work is created.
WHY DID I BECOME AN ARTIST? WHY DID GOD GIVE ME THIS TALENT? no answer
I feel like giving up and try to lead a normal life but I can't. I feel dead without my art!
After a decade still want to paint. get so many ideas...my brain is bombarded with ideas..where is the energy to balance it and the resources! stacks of papers.pencil works , artworks .. have to stop and start moving these works.
Feng shui and Reiki both indicate that I have to move the earlier works to make place for the new. Not get attached to them and accept to part with them. Attachments are trouble..I have to be free.
Struggling with the past and the present sometimes I feel the artist within is dying a slow death. Maybe I may become normal and lead a normal life...just forget about art! Hussains and Razas are there no!

4 comments:

  1. recognition of a true artist, feel sad when sell her artwork

    ReplyDelete
  2. Today March 30 2012, I have come in action mode in this year! arranged all my artworks, counted and stacked them in order. Feels great to have cleared the clutter and organised
    will have to sell and hope that my paintings get a new home.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Today August 3, 2016, Life is Awesome, sold few paintings Internationally as well as on home ground!Collection has gone to thousands , this year also burnt some old paintings, free space, fresh creativity, more confidence!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Today August 3, 2016, Life is Awesome, sold few paintings Internationally as well as on home ground!Collection has gone to thousands , this year also burnt some old paintings, free space, fresh creativity, more confidence!

    ReplyDelete

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